Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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