WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
