i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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