idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
