tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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