whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
