did you get engaged???
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
