We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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