Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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