If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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