kristin has been a bad kristin
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
