David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Drunk is not a location!
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
