The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
