I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
