Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
This is my gift to your gina
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
