She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
