I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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