wat bout pragnant strippers??
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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