Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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