it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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