Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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