worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
