he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
