the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
