There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
