Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
