apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
