drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
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