Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Randomize
