quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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