hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
