Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
