Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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