he wants to bone in the snuggie
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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