love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
