somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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