So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
