I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
