i used baking grease as lip gloss
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
