North Korea, Best Korea!
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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