ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Need sex. Gaining weight.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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