when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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