We're facebook friends in real life
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
two words...techno handjob
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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