she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize