R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
