But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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