Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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