Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
