I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I cannot find my penis.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
