worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
