I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize